Do You Have to Allow Single Wedding Guests to Bring a Date?

November 15, 2009 by  
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wedding etiquetteIt is an age old dilemma: must a bride and groom allow every single guest to bring along a date to their wedding? Are “plus ones” truly mandatory? This handy guide will solve your wedding guest issues, show you how to draw the line, and give you the etiquette that you need to support your decision.

First the short answer: No. It is not necessary to include “and guest” on every wedding invitation. Your wedding is really about sharing a special moment in your life with those that are nearest and dearest to you. Strangers whom you have never met are really not a part of that equation. Many brides and grooms would prefer not to invite their guests to bring along their own guests, but are afraid that it would be somehow rude to draw a line about who may come to their own wedding. Fear not; etiquette is on your side on this one. It is absolutely acceptable not to put “and guest” on the wedding invitations of single friends and relatives.

The key to pulling this off with a minimum of hurt feelings is to know where the line is and to stick with it in an evenhanded manner. In other words, it would not be fair to allow some single guests to bring dates but not others. It is along the lines of a wedding’s policy on children: you either have them, or you don’t. Period. This way even if your guests do not like your decision, they will at least see that it is fair and consistent.

Bear in mind that not all unmarried people are single (it should go without saying that a married couple would always be invited as a pair). The guests whom you invite to your wedding are at least in theory special people in your life; before mailing out invitations, take the time to do a little research into their romantic status. An unmarried couple who live together should definitely be invited as a pair, just like a husband and wife. It is definitely a nice gesture to also invite partners in long term relationships, even they do not live together. The names of those partners should appear on the wedding invitation. In other words, they are wanted and invited, not random “plus ones”.

All of this sounds great in practice, until you start getting calls from your single friends asking if they can bring someone along to your wedding. Then what? Hold firm in your decision and apply it evenly. One easy out is to simply say that you cannot afford any extra guests or that you are at the max capacity for your venue. Those are pretty hard statements for anyone to question.

You might also point out to your unattached guests that a wedding can be a great place to meet someone new. Love is in the air, and everyone is dressed their best. The single ladies will be decked out in their prettiest dresses and most glamorous accessories, like Swarovski crystal bracelets. The single men will be looking sharp in their handsome suits. A few spins around the dance floor, Swarovski crystal bracelets sparkling in the light, some shared laughs, who knows…the next great love could be the one that blossomed at your wedding. Now isn’t that better than trying to scrounge up a last-minute wedding date who doesn’t know anyone and would probably prefer to stay home? With that argument in hand, you may just convince your single friends that you are doing them a favor by skipping the “and guest”!

About the Author Laura Firenze

Finding the whole process of weddings and all the planning that goes into one fascinating, Laura writes about many of the considerations that brides have to deal with. Make any outfit more fabulous with stacks of sparkling Swarovski crystal bracelets.

Wedding Guest Favor Ideas

Luxurious Silk Fan in Elegant, Laser-Cut Gift Box (Black or Ivory, Set of 4)
Luxurious Silk Fan in Elegant, Laser-Cut Gift Box (Black or Ivory, Set of 4)
Unit Price: As low as $1.90
“With This Ring” Chrome Diamond-Ring Bottle Stopper in Personality Box™
“With This Ring” Chrome Diamond-Ring Bottle Stopper in Personality Box™
Unit Price: As low as $2.50
“Key To My Heart” Chrome Bottle Stopper
“Key To My Heart” Chrome Bottle Stopper
Price: As low as $2.00
“Sweet Celebrations!” Ceramic Banana Split Salt and Pepper Shakers
“Sweet Celebrations!” Ceramic Banana Split Salt and Pepper Shakers
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Personalized Glass Favor Jars (Set of 12)
Personalized Glass Favor Jars (Set of 12)
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“Slice of Style” Stainless Steel High Heel Cake Server
“Slice of Style” Stainless Steel High Heel Cake Server
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Unique Wedding Favors – 8 Ideas

November 6, 2009 by  
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unique wedding favorsWedding favors often evoke a “been there, done that” response from wedding guests. Looking for something a little more memorable than a bag of Jordan almonds? Here are our top choices for a few inspiring guest thank-yous.

Late night munchies
After dancing for hours, rolling out individual snacks like mini hamburgers with a fixings bar are a big hit

Photo shop
Rent a photo booth and let your guests take turns posing for the camera. Set up a DIY station with mini-frames so they can take home their favorite shots.

Escape the Elements
If you really want to impress, give your guests something sublimely stylish yet useful to keep them smiling through the elements: stylish sunglasses (to deflect glare), sleek umbrellas (in case of rain), or cashmere scarves (should a breeze pick up).

Personalized Thank-yous
Place small journals at each place setting, and write every guest a personal thank-you note on the front page.

Make some noise
Liven up the party, and hand out maracas, small horns, or even kazoos – a great idea for a relaxed affair or a particularly festive bunch.

Family-favorites
Gather a collection of favorite family recipes from both sides into a small recipe book or box printed with your names and wedding date.

Final Farewell
Send guests away with a final parting gift, and enlist the parking attendants to place a flower with an attached thank-you note on the dashboard of each car. If you’ll be providing guest transportation, be sure to place a basket of these favors at the front of the bus for guests to take prior to departure.

Give Back
Yes, this idea has been done – but altruism is at an all-time high, and we’re jumping on the bandwagon . Donating in the name of your guests to a charity, one that holds special meaning for the two of you, adds another sentimental personal touch to your wedding.

Get even more ideas for unique wedding favors at the Elegala.com wedding favors and gifts guide.

About the Author

Cori Russell is editor for Elegala.com and Gala Weddings Magazine. Elegala.com is a complete weddings and wedding planning resource with a national directory of wedding venues and services, how-to guides, expert advice, checklists and photo galleries to walk brides and grooms through every step of the planning process.

Unique Wedding Favor Ideas

“Sew Perfect” Classic Houndstooth Sewing Kit
“Sew Perfect” Classic Houndstooth Sewing Kit
Price: As low as $1.75
“An Outstanding Couple!” Bride and Groom 3-D Pop-Up Favor Box (Set of 24, Can be Personalized)
“An Outstanding Couple!” Bride and Groom 3-D Pop-Up Favor Box (Set of 24, Can be Personalized)
Unit Price: As low as $1.00
“Cosmetic Couture” Quilted  Monogrammed Make-Up Bag
“Cosmetic Couture” Quilted Monogrammed Make-Up Bag
Price: $5.00
“Cut Out for Each Other” Stainless-Steel  Heart-Shaped Cookie Cutters
“Cut Out for Each Other” Stainless-Steel Heart-Shaped Cookie Cutters
Price: As low as $1.75
“Something Blue” Four Scented Soaps with Blue-Satin Ribbon and Imprinted Charm
“Something Blue” Four Scented Soaps with Blue-Satin Ribbon and Imprinted Charm
Price: As low as $2.50
“Hot off the Grill!” Mini-Grill Tea Light/Place Card Holders w/ Hamburger & Hotdog Place Cards (S/4)
“Hot off the Grill!” Mini-Grill Tea Light/Place Card Holders w/ Hamburger & Hotdog Place Cards (S/4)
Unit Price: As low as $2.25
“Hugs & Kisses from Mr. & Mrs.!” Adhesive Bandages in Reusable Tin
“Hugs & Kisses from Mr. & Mrs.!” Adhesive Bandages in Reusable Tin
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“Lovebirds” Chrome Bottle Stopper
“Lovebirds” Chrome Bottle Stopper
Price: As low as $3.20
“Bourbon Street” Streetlight Place Card Holder with Coordinating Place Cards (Set of 4)
“Bourbon Street” Streetlight Place Card Holder with Coordinating Place Cards (Set of 4)
Unit Price: As low as $1.40
“Imperial” Exquisite Glass Photo Coasters
“Imperial” Exquisite Glass Photo Coasters
Price: As low as $2.10
“Love  Dove” Tea Light/Place Card Holder (Set of 4)
“Love Dove” Tea Light/Place Card Holder (Set of 4)
Unit Price: As low as $2.50
“Hats Off!” Chrome Top Hat Wine Pourer/Bottle Stopper
“Hats Off!” Chrome Top Hat Wine Pourer/Bottle Stopper
Price: As low as $2.99
“Side by Side” Bride-and-Groom Photo Album Favors
“Side by Side” Bride-and-Groom Photo Album Favors
Price: As low as $1.60
“Happily Ever After” Carriage Candle (Set of 4)
“Happily Ever After” Carriage Candle (Set of 4)
Unit Price: As low as $2.10
“Park Place” Vintage Park Bench Place Card/Photo Holder (Set of 4)
“Park Place” Vintage Park Bench Place Card/Photo Holder (Set of 4)
Unit Price: As low as $1.50
“Lucky Elephant” Antique Ivory-Finish Tea Light Holder
“Lucky Elephant” Antique Ivory-Finish Tea Light Holder
Price: As low as $2.90
“Rustic Elegance” Adirondack Chair Place Card/Photo Holder (Set of 4)
“Rustic Elegance” Adirondack Chair Place Card/Photo Holder (Set of 4)
Unit Price: As low as $2.00
Natural Bamboo Eco-Friendly Coaster Favors (Four Coasters per Favor!)
Natural Bamboo Eco-Friendly Coaster Favors (Four Coasters per Favor!)
Price: As low as $1.50
“Shalom” Silver-Metal Star of David Bookmark with Elegant Blue Tassel
“Shalom” Silver-Metal Star of David Bookmark with Elegant Blue Tassel
Price: As low as $1.50
“Cherry Blossoms” Frosted Glass Coasters
“Cherry Blossoms” Frosted Glass Coasters
Price: As low as $1.90
“Bubbly” Champagne Bubbles (Set of 24)
“Bubbly” Champagne Bubbles (Set of 24)
Unit Price: As low as $0.58

Choosing Wedding Favors – The Top 7 Common Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

February 25, 2009 by  
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by Linda Klingice-cream-scoop-of-love-favor

Choosing and giving wedding favors is a fun tradition. It‘s a heartfelt way to demonstrate your appreciation to your guests. And, of course, you want the perfect wedding favors for your perfect wedding. What could go wrong? Here are the top seven common wedding favor mistakes and tips to avoid them.

Mistake # 1 - Waiting too long to order. You‘re not a procrastinator. It‘s just that you‘re not sure how many wedding favors to order. So, you‘re waiting for the RSVP‘s to come in, so that you have a better idea of how many guests will be attending. Then, you‘ll place an order for the right number of favors.

But if you wait that long, you‘ll have less options available. Custom, personalized wedding favors can take time to create. If you postpone ordering to almost the last minute, you may not have enough time to get just want you want. You might have to settle for something else.

Mistake # 2 - Not getting the right amount. So, how do you plan in advance and get the right number of wedding favors? First, decide whether you want to give one favor to each of your guests, or one to each couple. You‘re probably safe in assuming that at least 80% of those on your guest list will be able to attend. Then, make sure you have extras.

What happens if you have too many favors? Well, that‘s better than not having enough. If you have favors left over after the wedding, you can always give them out or mail them to those who couldn‘t attend.

Mistake # 3 – Spending too much money. Wedding favors are tokens of appreciation to your guests for sharing your special day. They are not meant to be costly gifts. You shouldn‘t have to spend more than a couple of dollars for this gesture. If you find great favors that are also economical, you won‘t hesitate ordering extras.

Mistake # 4 – Buying favors that are not useful or functional. There is such a wide variety of wedding favors on the market today, so you‘re no longer limited to tulle covered dust collectors. Send your guest home with something they can use, such as personalized candles, chocolate bars, frames, magnets, bookmarks, packets of seeds or heart-shaped cookie cutters, to name just a few.

Mistake # 5 – Selecting favors that don‘t reflect your personality. If you‘re shopping on the internet, there is an endless array of unique wedding favors available. Why not choose something that highlights your hobbies, interests, or passions? Go with a theme. Some items, like personalized bookmarks, can contain a longer personal message, such as a favorite poem or quote. Any item with your photo would make a great keepsake. Your favors don‘t have to be bland and generic.

Mistake # 6 - Making your own favors. This may not seem like a mistake until you‘re sitting there one night, gluing a ribbon on the 83rd favor, thinking of all the other millions of things you have to do to get ready for your wedding. Even if you enjoy crafts, making 100 or more of the same thing can be tedious and time consuming. You may think you‘re saving a lot of money by doing it yourself, but craft supplies can be expensive. If you add it up, you might even pay less for professionally made favors, and you‘ll have a lot more time on your hands.

Mistake # 7 – Not giving out favors at all. No, it‘s not absolutely necessary to have wedding favors. But they are such a nice way to say a little “thank you“ to your guests for sharing their love, support and friendship. They are not only a thoughtful addition to your reception, but will remind everyone of your wonderful wedding.

So, shop around and find the perfect wedding favors for you. Select something that is decorative, functional and inexpensive. Make sure it‘s personalized to showcase you‘re uniqueness as a couple. Order well in advance. And wait for your guests to tell you that it‘s the best wedding favor they have ever received.

Linda Kling is the owner of Photo Party Favors, which offers personalized photo favors and photo save the date cards. Visit her website for more information on photo wedding favors, plus recipes, tips, free printable candy bar wrappers, more.


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